Systems are inherently dynamic and complex. The people, interconnections, and purpose behind the system and it's relationships heavily influence the health of a system.
Focusing on the dyads, triads, alliances, and stained relationships allow us to identify relationship patterns that are strengths and can be generalized as well as unhealthy dynamics that need to be addressed, minimized or eradicated.
Genograms (pictorial images of a family system) can be very helpful in this work.
The Systems Approach can be used in workplaces, friend groups, church communities and any other group of people who desire to maximize the health of relationship dynamics.
People of color tend to communicate narratively, through story-telling. It is a passed down tradition taught to us from our elders.
Narrative Therapy embraces this communication style and allows people to express themselves unapologetically. There is no worry of needing to code switch or present in a politically correct way in order to be seen with empathy, compassion and humanism.
This freedom and vulnerability allows the therapist to highlight strengths, resiliency, dominant narratives, values, and belief systems. We can then identify emotional, psychological and behavioral patterns that perpetuate the old narratives. Lastly, we create alternative narratives and lean into mind, body, soul, spiritual changes to manifest the desired shifts.
John Gottman is a researcher out of the University of Minnesota. He and his wife have studied couples for 30 years and can predict divorce up to 90% based on unhealthy and harmful relationship dynamics of divorced or divorcing couples.
My goal is to provide as much education as possible to motivate and inspire change. His techniques are foundational to my couples work.
Have you ever tried to communicate your authentic feelings to someone and still not get your point across? It's possible you are not communicating in their Love Language. The integration of Love Languages in couples and family work has been very helpful in helping parties discover each of their love languages and learn how to communicate in those languages. It increases impact 100 fold!
7 Principles of Successful Relationships by John Gottman
Love Languages by Gary Chapman
Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High, Second Edition by Joseph Grenny